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Friday, May 31, 2013

Who Screwed Up the Travel Channel?

Sometimes on a rainy day, I like to sit and ponder the deeper meanings of life. 

  • Who screwed up the Travel Channel? Why are there no "travel" shows on the Travel Channel? Slimey poker games and other silly non-travel fluff have replaced interesting and colorful travel programs for years now. And whatever happened to Samantha Brown? I always enjoyed her perky travel get-aways.
  •  When it's pouring rain outside, why don't my outdoor potted plants get wet? It can be raining more furious than a monsoon in Mexico and yet my container flowers remain dry as a Baptist revival in southern Georgia. As a result, I have to hand-water the potted plants sometimes as much as twice a day....even on a wet, soppy, rainy afternoon.
  •  And speaking of flowers. Why do my neighbor's flowers across the street ALWAYS look bigger, healthier and more colorful than mine? We both planted similar type flowers the very same week. But after two weeks, hers are huge and mine are....wishing they could join the garden party across the street.
  • Why don't I ever win a beauty make-over? Could it be I'm already too beautiful...or is it because my name is never submitted?
  • Why does my husband, after unloading groceries into the car, push the shopping cart half mile back to inside the store, in the snow and yet NEVER unload our dishwasher in the morning?
  •  Why am I the only nitwit who cannot figure out Pinterest?
  • Why am I so jealous of that female voice on our GPS (who sounds exactly like  former news anchor Connie Chung)...that I insist my husband turn down the volume when he's driving? Seriously!  What is wrong with me?
  •  Why can't I figure out how to secure my own grandson safely into his car seat when he can strap himself into it in less than a minute?
  • Why does my bucket list have a hole in it? No wonder I haven't accomplished anything.
  • Why does the thought of a D.Q Peanut Buster Parfait torment me all summer long?
  •  If 60 is the new an afternoon nap the new foreplay?

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