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Wednesday, February 24, 2010

If the Ground Zero Memorial Were Up to Me.

Have you heard what's been happening at Ground Zero lately? New Yorkers have undoubtedly known this for years. But now the rest of us are learning that after nearly 9 years, Ground Zero remains basically an empty pit. The site of the horrific 9/11 terrorist attacks in New York City was supposed to be transformed into a towering cluster of colossal architectural landmarks and monuments. But construction has been stalled from the very beginning. Plans called for 5 skyscrapers, a memorial, a museum, a theater and a transit hub. As of today, very little work has been done even though billions of dollars have already been spent. The site languishes as a giant hole in the enormous dirty, dusty ditch. It's become an epic boondoggle that disgraces the memory of those who died there and highlights the shameful egotistical behavior, conflicts, disagreements, bureaucratic bungling, incompetence and political wrangling of the project coordinators. Turns out the various parties involved are currently not even speaking to each other. Sounds like Congress, doesn't it?

Personally, I always wondered why the powers that be in New York City felt it necessary to build massive, towering structures as a way to memorialize the 9/11 location. If it were up to me, I'd turn the entire area into a beautiful and tranquil park...a vast green space to honor all those who perished there. I'd call it "Peace Park".  It would be a bookend to Central Park. Of course a park would not bring in zillions of real estate cash flow. But for me, I don't see the need for another cash cow, another colossal tax payer money pit. I don't see the need for another canyon of cold, concrete/steel mega-towers, constant bickering among conniving developers and scheming politicians and billions of wasted dollars. What I visualize is a solemn, simple yet elegant, dignified setting surrounded with splendid natural beauty, resounding with noble patriotic pride that pays tribute to all those fallen souls who exemplify the true American spirit.   But...that's just me.
           Ground zero photo courtesy of: Sphere: Related Content

Friday, February 19, 2010

Is Tiger Woods Out of the Woods Now?

Tiger Woods apologized
Publicly as advertised.
Now it's time to analyze
Speculate and scrutinize:

Did he mean it? Was he up front?
Or was it all a PR stunt?
His mommy's there but wifey's not
Did she decide to let him rot?
And who's on board his pleasure yacht? 

Sorry, sorry, I was bad with girls aplenty
Can't recall if it was 200 or twenty.
I just know it was a multitude
And now I'm back to rehab, dude.

Does he miss his sleazy skanks?
Why does Gloria Allred defend their ranks?
Will the world accept his amends?
Is Tiger's conscience really cleansed?

Tiger prowled and didn't think twice
Had his fun and paid the price
A bit more therapy
And we shall see
If Tiger's tamed his virility.

I say give the guy a mulligan break
All this in front of his mother, for goodness sake.
He's back with Buddha and maybe his wife
Trying to repair his sordid life
Yet ya gotta remember he's no poor slob
It's not like he's worried 'bout finding a job. 

I'm gonna change my tawdry ways
Get on course to better days
It's my fault and I repent.
I'll give up porn least for Lent

But will he tell Oprah one of these days
All about his cheatin' ways?
Or spill his guts to Larry King
And offer tips on the perfect swing?
When all the hype is said and done
Will he be redeemed by a hole in one?
Or if that doesn't do the trick---
Simple castration...neat and quick. Sphere: Related Content

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Winter Wonderland

Bundled up in a heavy coat

I struggle to walk against the fury of the merciless wind

as the chill factor freezes my exposed skin

and my ears scream in pain for protection from the savage cold.

What strange forces have collided to wreak such frigid temperatures

upon this oasis of global warming?

Masses of humanity come from lands far, far away

for the sensation of tropical golden splendor.

I feel a twinge of pity for them as they huddle together...shocked, amazed

and angry that such epic glacial conditions have iced their well-laid plans.

But Mother Nature shows no favoritism.

She imparts her wrath with nonpartisan glee.

The sun is out but the streets are unusually quiet.

The shoreline is wind-whipped and as frothy as a caramel macchiato on steroids.

Shivering and quivering the tourists cower indoors at the bar

or watch TV in their rooms.

Even the souvenir stores are empty.

The beach is completely deserted except for a stray seagull or

a half naked couple from Pennsylvania desperately seeking tan.

Thousands of empty, blue, beach chaise-lounges stretch across the sand,

waiting in vain for sunbathers. But no one comes.

Not a single car in the vast beach parking lot. Not a one.

A bearded man, wearing a ski parka and a coon skin cap...

(I am not making this up)...stands on a street corner selling firewood.

This is the winter Florida experience...47 high noon.

Volleyball, anyone?

Lonely cabana chairs sit idle on a deserted Florida Gulf beach. 
A few shivering sunbathers brave the chilly weather at the Don Cesar Hotel
on St. Pete Beach, FL.  Notice the guy on the left in a coat and blanket.

Sphere: Related Content

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Valentine's Day...The Superbowl of Love

It's time to celebrate Valentine's Day or as I like to call it: the Super Bowl of Love. It's the red-letter heart day that men and women alike want to score big points with someone special. The pressure is on. No fumbling allowed. Tackling is encouraged. Winning is everything. The Valentine's Day playbook revolves around matters of the heart, love, romance and doing something extra nice for someone we cherish. Flowers, candy, cards, a bottle of wine...all traditional ways to show we care. But what is it that attracts two people in the first place? And what keeps them together? Age-old questions. Is it love at first sight? Physical appearance? Social status? Muscles? Cleavage? Bedroom eyes. Sexy legs? A great smile? Personality? Intelligence?

Six pack abs or bodacious boobs might spark initial infatuation. But personally, I think lasting relationships are about much more than physical eye candy. Positive behavioral traits generally win out over superficiality. Don't get me wrong. Good looks can't hurt and a fun sense of humor is an asset. But as far as I'm concerned, one of the most important attributes in the process of falling in love and staying in love is kindness. That may sound pollyanna-ish and old-fashioned. But look around at couples who have weathered many storms and still remain blissfully together. Real, deep, satisfying love blazes with kindness, thoughtfulness, consideration, appreciation, understanding, respect...all similar characteristics that combine to create passionate, enduring and endearing, happy and successful long-term relationships. I can attest to that with my own special guy. We've been happily married (most of the time) for over 30 years. And that's what I call a winning touchdown in the crazy game of love. Sphere: Related Content

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Random Super Bowl Observations by Somebody Who Could Care Less About Football

Super Bowl XLIV. Miami. First off, I readily admit I don't like football. I think it's incredibly boring. Seems like it's just a series of start, stop, start, stop with a lot of whistle blowing in between and more time-outs than a 3 year old gets in a year. The players are bunched together in a huddle and whenever they do run, inevitably somebody gets tackled. Even so, millions of people watch the big game and so I thought maybe I should too. Here are a few things about this game I observed, learned or wondered about while intermittently switching the remote between Super Bowl and HGTV.
1. One single ticket cost anywhere from $1000 to over $20,000. And we're in a recession?
2. The commercials weren't funny or memorable, except for the ETrade babies. With a price tag of $2 million per 30 second slot, I guess the advertisers didn't get stimulus money for humor and originality.
3. The coach or manager for the Saints---the gum chewing guy in the black jacket, black cap, headset and sunglasses---looks a lot like Kenney Chesney.
4. Do the players wear the same uniforms for every game? I wonder how much each suit costs. Can the winners sell them on ebay for a ton of money?
5. A lot of the players look fat...really overweight. Their bellies resemble bulging rolls of blubber and their butts shake like pudding. Two words, big fellas: Body shapers.
6. The WHO did a decent half-time performance. Several old hits, one right after another, non-stop. They must have been exhausted afterwards. Roger Daltry still looks really good. I wonder if that's his real hair.
7. Over on HGTV, a couple bought a nice house in Carmel, a burb of Indianapolis, for just under one million dollars.
8. Back at the game, did you notice how often the players spit water out of their mouths and onto the sidelines? Gross. Imagine falling into that slimey cesspool of bacteria.
9. How many of you know the real story behind Who Dat Nation? I do. Check out Wikipedia for a quick explanation.
10. The winning team is awarded a huge gleaming gold trophy called the Lombardi Trophy, in honor of legendary Green Bay Packers coach, Vince Lombardi. But in the show's opening shots, why was rapper Jay-Z hoisting the trophy like he deserved it?
11. In the end, I have to admit it was an exciting game. The underdog Nawlins Saints not only won a stunning victory but the hearts of the nation...a powerful inspiration for Katrina devastated New Orleans.
12. And finally, an interesting side note. It turns out that after Janet Jackson's infamous costume malfunction at the 2004 Super Bowl, all the half-time shows since then have featured male Baby Boomer era performers. What? Old geezer guy rockers don't have to worry about crotch constraints? Here's the list of past Super Bowl half time acts:
   2005: Paul McCartney; age 63 that year.
   2006: Rolling Stones; Mick Jagger; age 63 that year.
   2007: Prince; age 59 that of the group.
   2008: Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers; age 60 that year.
   2009: Bruce Springsteen; age 60 that year.
   2010: The Who; Roger Daltry is 66 and Pete Townshend is 64.
Do Boomers still rock or what? It's not Who Dat Nation. It's Boomer Nation that rules!~!  And that's what I got out of Super Bowl XLIV. Sphere: Related Content
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