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Tuesday, November 6, 2012

The Buck Stops Here...Literally!


This might be sad to hear
But I’m not fond of deer.
They may strut with grace
And have a cute, cuddly face

But they don’t know their place
When they debase
My garden space.
It’s a disgrace.

They devour every flower
And for good measure
They smile with pleasure
Noshing on my blooming treasure.

I yell, I plead, I shoo them away
But to my dismay
They won’t stray from my garden buffet.
It’s their favorite hang-out café.

I'm not fooled by their bambi looks
Those doey eyes out of story books.
They steal my plants in broad daylight
Or sneak around in the dead of night.

Spring, summer and fall
They have a culinary ball.
Even during snowy winter
They eat my evergreens down to a splinter.

Now listen up, you hungry beasts
I’m tired of providing your daily feasts.
You just finished off my beautiful mums
And you’re still coming back for tasty crumbs.

I’ve had it up to here, you pesky deer
Enough is enough, so you’d better stay clear
Of my precious garden plot.
Trot back to your own forest lot.

Oh I know, we’ve invaded your territory
But boo hoo on that old sob story.
I don’t shoot at you or sling arrows your way
I don’t even eat your meat, I dare say.

So do me a favor if you please
Return to the woods with big oak trees,
Ticks and fleas and lyme disease
And leave my flowers to the birds and bees.

Now if you abide by this humble truce,
You will not replace our Christmas goose.
But if you don’t stop your nibbling ways
Then it’s roasted venison for the holidays!
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ReformingGeek said...


I'm right there with you. Last week, seven of them were playing chase in my yard digging their little hooves into my grass. This is after devouring the pansies.

Coffeypot said...

The solution
Can be narrow
If you would purchase
A Bow and Arrow

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