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Thursday, May 13, 2010

Liberals do Lunch.

Afternoon lunch in a swanky D.C. eatery...three top administration officials casually discuss the merits of allowing illegal immigrants to remain in the United States: 

By god, that stupid Arizona law is gonna kill us. We need all the minority votes we can drag over the border.

Damn strait and I'll have another martini.

But illegals can't vote.

Oh, we got people working on that.

I don't care if illegals are not legal. I don't care if they're breaking the law. They have rights..... And make mine a double.

Well, technically they don't have rights in the U.S. but once we give them amnesty, then they'll have rights.

Yah, and if we send them back or prosecute them, the wife and I will lose our housekeeper, Conchita, all our landscape people AND our nanny. It's just not fair.

That Conchita sure makes tasty chili rellenos. Yummy.

And your nanny ain't so bad either. Yummy. Heh, heh , heh.

Tell me about it, amigo. Ha, ha, ha.

Guys, you're missing the point. That crazy tea bagger crowd is gonna vote us out.

Naw, they're just a bunch of old coots who like to fart off at town hall meetings.

OK. Here's a plan: we keep the illegals and ship the tea baggers off to Ciudad Juarez. Set up a phony town hall meeting. Hire a Glenn Beck look-alike to drive the bus and before they can scream "Sara Palin"... they're across the border and those Mexican drug gangs will pick off every one of their sorry butts. 

Elder care...Mexican style. Ha, ha, ha. 

That's crazy, dude. Did you lose part of your brain when you got that goofy hair transplant?

Hey, don't mock my new hair revitalization. Or my butt lift and my nose job. And how about that snazzy new, fifty grand, security fence around your vacation compound?

All thanks to taxpayers.

Ya gotta love em. Cheers. 

But can we fight this Arizona law?

I say we boycott the Grand Canyon and Las Vegas.

Vegas is not in Arizona, you idiot.

Oh, thank god. I've got tickets to Cirque du Soleil and a spa session at the Belagio coming up soon.

We'd be slumming it without the American taxpayers, that's for sure! Ha, ha ha.

I've got it. Let's take a fact-finding junket to Mexico.

Awesome! We can spend one week in Acapulco. Another in Los Cabos and just to be fair...five days in Cancun.

Just make sure Rahm doesn't hear about it. I don't want him hauling his foul-mouth along with us.

Not to worry. He's too busy protecting those poor, misguided 9/11 terrorists.

Well, bring your Cipro, scuba gear, golf clubs, your passport, security ID, birth certificate, first born child and other personal documents. They're really strict over there. They don't want no stinkin' gringo drug dealers coming in to Mexico.

Ya. But they're happy as a Margarita to let em loose on our side of the creek.

Speaking of Margaritas...let's have a round to celebrate our bold decision.

Ahhh, here's to sun, sand and tequila. 

It's good to be in power.

Thanks to the American taxpayers. Ha, ha, ha. 

Check, please. Sphere: Related Content


Brenda Grolle said...

I love your humor. Sadly, I think you hit it dead on.

Either we can laugh or cry about it.

Hmmm, maybe we can do a bit of both.

Betty said...

I agree with Brenda on this one. You hit it straight on.


Kristen {a little ditty} said...

Yup, I think this about sums things pathetic as that is.

Marla said...

I wish this was fiction.

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